Two weeks ago I fell. I fell hard.
Temperatures rose to a balmy 37*, the rain fell gently down, the snow slowly melted and then as surely as the temperatures rose, they began to drop.
What had been water cascading down the asphalt driveway was now a crystalline black sheet of ice. This is when the fall occurred. When night and morning are blurred together. One day has ended, the next just beginning.
I was called to "rescue" my daughter from a sleep-over that had turned to homesickness; my husband, still on travel and landing at the airport; my son, sleeping and dreaming of new adventures. I pull on my coat and grab my keys and proceed to rescue my precious little one from the dark night.
I should have surrendered when my truck refused to climb the incline of the drive and instead chose to slide sideways back towards the garage, but my daughter needed me. Not once, but several times my truck refused my direct command to retrieve my precious little one. I was on a mission and failure was not an option. So, I get out of the truck and investigate the reason for the refusal, knowing good and well what the problem was, but not really wanting to admit defeat.
I am able to climb the incline, why shouldn't the truck be able too...and then it happened. I was standing in all my "in-control" self and then I wasn't. Though I should not have been, I was in total surprise of where I found myself...cold, wet, and hurt, really hurt. All I could think about was " Please, God, let me get to my daughter, she needs me."
I was not going anywhere. She was brought to me, safe and sound.
I had a lesson to learn and it has taken two weeks to fully receive it.
When we (I) fall from GRACE, it sometimes catches us by surprise even though we have seen it coming and refuse to take another route.
My fall has left me with back pain, no bruise, but pain that will take some time to heal. The bruise will come later, the hurt is deep.
Sin is that way. The hurt goes deep, the pain has caused scarring and sometimes we are unaware of the bruising until the shades of our sin become visible through the eyes of TRUTH.
The healing does come. The hurt is healed all the way through to the marrow, the root of the sin is no more. GRACE has been renewed.
I still have a way to go before my back is the same, however because of my fall, I was able to warn my husband of the ice, I was able to be humbled into letting go and allowing someone else to rescue my precious little daughter, and I have been blessed by the SPIRIT.
Now when my back catches, I am reminded of slowing down and listening to the still small voice that is leading the way, the way of the righteous, not of the in-control!!