Thursday, October 7, 2010

Being robbed by doubt

When I started this 40 day journey, I had no idea what or how or where GOD was leading me. I still really don't. However, there seems to be a pattern starting and I just know that it has GOD written all over it.

After my first post, a friend of mine sent me a message and said that it caught her eye because this year's focus in the group she teaches is on Preventing Identity Theft, Protecting who GOD meant for you to be. Then today over at Faith Barista, she is having a "jam" with the question, Can Faith Change your Personality? AND then Ann talks about having secrets, which cause hurt, pain and falling away. On top of ALL that, during bible study this morning, the focus was on John the Baptist and his sudden doubt of who he thought Jesus was and his own role in it, because now he was locked away and death was sure to come. (Luke 7:18-23)

When the same subject, though under different lenses, keeps getting have to wonder...GOD is up to something and we might just need to stop and take notice.

This is not a new question or even a new problem. It starts in the garden with Eve and the serpent. Doubt was introduced and she questioned who she was and WHO GOD WAS in relation to her. Her identity was being held hostage by a stranger, an enemy, who only wants to cause death and destruction. Just for the record, this happens to men too, though they are less likely to talk about it.

So what do we do?

The problem is that we are caught of guard, just like Eve. We have a relationship with GOD and it is good. We are in small groups, bible studies, on-line blogs sharing our faith. Then something, or someone blind sides us and we fall, fall hard. This is the open door for doubt to come in and sit a spell.

For Eve is was a play on words...Did HE really say...surely HE did not say...

For John the Baptist it was a dark prison cell and he KNEW what he was put on this earth for...making a path for the ONE, and the ONE was there, but he was in jail, how was he to make a path???

DOUBT it is the enemy's "go to" snare especially for believers.

For me, it was my sister dying within 40 days of being diagnosed with cancer. See, GOD had spared her when she had been brutally attacked in her 20's. HE had spared her when she had been involved in a terrible car accident only a few years later. She was my parents first full term baby. SHE was the one who asked hard questions of the pastors at church. SHE was the one who always pointed me in the right direction. SHE was the one ministering in the very hospital halls while she was having treatments, giving hope to those without it. THIS, this can't be happening to HER, not when HE had saved HER so many times!!

I knew what GOD could do, I wondered why HE wasn't.

I knew that heaven is the ultimate healing, I wondered if I really believed.

I knew that GOD knows, I wondered does HE really?

GOD asked me to TRUST HIM and I said yes that I would, but I had already opened the door to DOUBT.

It has taken time, but I know that I know, I fully TRUST GOD with everything. My head knowledge has become my heart knowledge. Does that mean I don't doubt? No. Life is hard. However, doubt does not take is a human response to life in a fallen world. But now, it is also an invitation to prayer.

When doubt comes, I know to draw closer to GOD because the enemy wants just the opposite.

In Luke, Jesus knew that John the Baptist had the head knowledge, the doubt came from his heart because he was in dire straits. Jesus did not rebuke him, but assured him of his knowledge.

The only way to receive that assurance is too seek it. John the Baptist sent messengers to Jesus asking, Are you the one, or should we expect someone else? We have to actively seek the TRUTH in worship, prayer and study. TRUTH is the only way to keep out doubt!

Our identities are at risk of being taken from us through doubt of who we are in CHRIST!! KNOW HIM and KNOW who you are!!

1 comment:

  1. Jean. This took my breath away.

    "doubt.. is a human response.. but.. it is also an invitation to prayer."

    I loved that you shared your doubts in this post and showed us how it led to prayer and finding yourself with Jesus in the Scriptures.

    Thank you for sharing such a personal reflections in this season after your sister's passing on -- and adding it to the jam today. It speaks to my heart, as I believe will touch others.


Thank you for taking the time to leave a word of encouragement...I truly consider it a blessing that you have spent the time reading my scribbles in the sand.